This made me laugh

never get the wife upset about the washing machine, your last load will end up being done by you! By hand!

 

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Fred was a farmer and wanted to breed sheep, but his only male one was gay. So he try’s to impregnate them himself by taking them to the woods and shagging them all one by one. A local farmer tells him he’ll know his sheep are pregnant once they stop walking around and lay down. The next day Dave again bundles the sheep into his Range Rover and takes them to the forest and shags them all again, this time he’s shattered, and as soon as he gets home, he lets them out onto the field and goes strait to bed. In the morning he dives strait for the window to see if the sheep are lying down. To his dismay they’re all walking about. So again he bundles them into the car and heads to the forest. This time he shags them all twice for good luck. When he gets home he is again shattered, he lets them out onto the field and goes strait to bed. In the morning he asks his wife to look out the window to see what the sheep are doing. “That’s amazing” she says “What are they all laying down?” He asks “No, they’re all in the Range Rover and one of them’s beeping the horn”

 

Or spelling complicated words