This made me laugh

A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun.
"Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you"...
The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her.
"Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise.
"Ha, ha! I'm the man from the bus!"
"Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume. "I'm the bus driver"....

 

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Indeed some politicians, whilst doing a spot of tree surgery, and attempting to cut off a branch would sit on that limb and start cutting at the side nearest the trunk. They imagine they will survive intact - indeed they would expect their severed section not only to survive but prosper.

The daft thing is those same myopic politicians ridicule those who made a similar decision a few years ago, but are so self assured to believe that their special way of cutting the wood will make all the difference.

Funny old world.

 

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Yes, the roads are getting a bit bumpy, but it's OK: they have new warning signs for them.

 

Arguing a point using someone else’s intellect…

 

No - just keeping things light by choosing an image which expressed what I wanted to say. I doubt if many of our readers want to watch a ping-pong argument between us about the merits of independence (except Bikerman of course, who has probably just ordered an extra delivery of popcorn).

 

I didn’t mention either Bexit or in-duh-pendence so have no idea why you did.

 

I know the way your mind works...

 

I didn’t mean to start it again.

SQUIRREL…

 

Of course you didn't.

Squirrels:

 

Wouldn’t mind giving ‘em a jab...