I came home one night and said to my wife "hey you'd best watch out love, I've heard that bastard milkman of ours has shagged every woman down this street bar one" She replied "I bet it's that stuck up cow at number 14"
Scientists have revealed sperm helps hair grow. That explains why lots of men have hairy knuckles, but it’s got me wondering about my nan’s moustache.
I gave Noel Gallagher his first guitar. He said to me “What’s that knob at the front for?” I said “It’s Liam, he’s the lead singer!!..
My 90 year old neighbor asked me today if it was true that president Trump bought the castle in the next town called Rumpenheim and that they honor him by changing the towns name to Trumpenheim. She said, it was all over the radio. I told her to check the date... (and 'no': we Germans have no humor whatsoever )
Another mate called his girl friend to tell her he'd pick her up and take her out for Valentines day, table booked for 8, unfortunately they are no longer together as she didn't like pool!
My sexy Chinese neighbour said she was desperate for a roger, it wasn't until I'd got my trousers round my ankles I realized she wanted a LODGER!!!!!
