This made me laugh

Perhaps Poundland instead?

 

Sent this to my wife's brother - He was a bomb disposal tech.

 

A BOXING DAY POO
You sit upon the toilet
With everything prepared
You're feeling quite excited but
A little bloody scared!
That huge amount of Christmas nosh
Has turned into a log
And now the fateful time has come
To flush it down the bog!
But first you must expel the beast
And so you start to strain,
You bite down on a piece of wood
To take away the pain
But oh my god, its bloody huge
It's like you're giving birth!
You sweat and push and swear and shake
and strain for all your worth.
And then that magic moment comes,
That fills your soul with cheer,
A turd the size of King Kongs arm
Emerges from your rear.
And like a bomb it hits the pan
Thus lightening your mood,
And making room inside your guts
For lots more Christmas food!

 

Can't trust Alexa, even got the wrong picture.

 

Yeah, there's several of them about.

 

She should be posted in the Babe forum! What a woman!

 

That's like the old one about the hillbilly who is looking for a wife and puts an ad in the classifieds.

Looking for wife.
Must be able to dress game, clean fish and have pickup truck.
Send picture of truck.

 

A piece of frozen beef inexplicably fell out of the sky and landed in my yard.

I think it's a meateor.