This made me laugh

This is true!

I once rolled up into the driveway on a V45 Magna.

Surprize!

She didn't talk to me for a week!

As the meme says - A week of peace and quiet and a new motorcycle!

 

OK, sooo, carrying gas in extra containers is prohibited on the Garden State Parkway and the Atlantic City Expressway. Is beer OK?

 

Not for the dog

 

A husband carelessly walks into his house just after his wife had moped and waxed the floor, but before it had dried. She naturally killed him.
When the responding police officer was seen hesitating outside the door. A neighbor asked him why he hadn't arrested her, and what was he waiting for. He responded, "For the floor to dry!"

 

I have a thermos.

It keeps hot liquids hot and cold liquids cold.

How does it know?

 

I was set on being cremated when I slip the coils of my earthly bonds.

Seriously reconsidering that.

 

Eternity on a Harley? Must have led a very wicked life...

 

Haha think I’d rather go down into the depths of hell! Could be worse though; could be on a triumph !!

 

As a birthday treat for the wife I bought a map of the world, gave her a dart and said wherever it lands I’ll take her there on holiday. We’re spending 2 weeks behind the fridge.