Been Away For A While

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by BonnieCat, Feb 22, 2020.

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  1. BonnieCat

    BonnieCat Crème de la Crème

    Feb 20, 2016
    3,423
    1,000
    Netherlands
    So as some of you might have noticed, I’ve been a way for a while, here’s why.

    After just landing in Gran Canaria for my holiday and whilst waiting for my luggage to come off the carousel, I switched on my cell phone to see a message from my Mum. My heart sank. My dad had been sick with cancer and I’d already arranged to go over to see him immediately after I got back. The message was that he was now at deaths door and now I was even further away than I was in the Netherlands. I arrived at my hotel and knew I was going to have to come back. I couldn’t come back quick enough with the travel company I’d used for my holiday so booked a one way ticket with another company to fly back to the Netherlands the next morning. Later that evening in my hotel room I got a phone call that my Dad had passed. I was devastated because I couldn’t get back in time to say goodbye, I was thousands of miles away. It was awful. The next morning I got a taxi back to the airport and after another 4 hour flight I was back in the Netherlands, collected my car and the next day drove to Rotterdam to catch the ferry over to the UK. P&O ferries were brilliant in that they only charged a tiny amount to change my ferry ticket because of the above circumstances.
    We had the funeral, and I stayed at my mums for a couple of weeks and a couple of weeks ago I arrived back home. The very next day I started my new job and have just finished my second week back in the office.
    In retrospect I shouldn’t have flown to Gran Canaria but my mum said I should go as my dad wasn’t so bad then, but he took a turn for the worse, and the end came so very fast. He was in a terrible state apparently and was moved to a hospice for special care. Thats two special people lost to cancer, my partner and now my Dad. My mum is doing ok she has a lot of support.
    Enjoy and look after your loved ones because they can be taken away in an instant.
     
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  2. joe mc donald

    Dec 26, 2014
    13,874
    1,000
    slough / burnham
    BonnieCat
    I was taking a break from forums. But had a look and saw this note from you. My heart goes out to you and I feel your pain. But you know in your heart of hearts your Dad would not have had it any other way and indeed wants you to be happy in what you do. Don't blame your self he knows you would have been by his side and in spirit you were. My Dad was the same In Ireland. We were with him when he said my son go home to England as you know that's your future and I am going to be fine again. We just got back when the phone rang to say he was back in Hospital for the last time never even unpacked just turned around and travelled and again Stenna were terrific when I explained they said there is a transport ferry later tonight jump on it and get home. Never charged us anything. But again we were to late. So we all wish there were things we could change but my Dad didn't want it and your Dad I just feel was the same. Do put a smile back on your face. And know from me that every single member is there with you now and the hugs are abundant.
    God Bless You.
    Joe.
     
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  3. Wessa

    Wessa Cruising

    Apr 27, 2016
    11,318
    1,000
    North West England
    I'm so sorry for your loss Nikki, and this after your earlier tragic loss of your partner. My thoughts are with you. :heart:
     
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  4. dilligaf

    dilligaf Guest

    So sad Nikki
    We’re all thinking of you and sending our love :heart:
     
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  5. Dawsy

    Dawsy Cumbrian half-wit
    Subscriber

    Aug 24, 2018
    4,686
    800
    Cumbria
    Hugs and sympathy Bonniecat. Also, sound words of wisdom from Joe. Well written Joe
     
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  6. GaleForceEight

    GaleForceEight Noble Member

    Nov 1, 2017
    741
    393
    Southend
    I lost mum to cancer... was due to see her at the weekend when I got the call, so I phoned the school and told them to get the kids ready to go, and drove... sometimes you just need to drop everything to be there for people who need you.

    When we got to the hospital mum asked me why I was there.

    ‘Because you are awesome’.

    ...and she was. She died that night just after my brother had driven from Spain to get there and she clung on until he got to us through sheer guts and determination.

    so you needed to do what you had to. And you did. And we love you because you are the type of person who will do that.

    760A24BD-7361-4B46-8C01-216A8E337964.jpeg
     
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  7. steve lovatt

    steve lovatt Something else

    May 12, 2014
    9,211
    1,000
    North Yorkshire
    Bloody hell Nikki you really are having a tough time of it aren't you. So sorry to hear this but you know that we are all thinking of you. :heart:
     
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  8. BonnieCat

    BonnieCat Crème de la Crème

    Feb 20, 2016
    3,423
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    And this is why I love this forum because of people like you. :heart::heart:
    Your messages are so beautiful.
    Thank you
     
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  9. Repooh

    Repooh Rarely Satisfied

    Jan 5, 2018
    1,427
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    Stabby Town
    Sad to hear your news, must have been super stressful. My thoughts go out to you
     
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  10. Oldfart

    Oldfart Senior Member

    Oct 25, 2019
    502
    243
    Staffs Moorlands
    My thoughts and sympathies go out to you BC

    I'll raise a glass to you at 9pm tonight

    Oldfart
     
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  11. Nolan 73

    Nolan 73 Member

    Jun 2, 2018
    30
    18
    Hampshire
    So sorry to hear your sad news . Sending our thoughts to you.
     
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  12. TEZ 217

    TEZ 217 Crème de la Crème

    Mar 6, 2016
    3,148
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    south shields
    As said terrible news Nikki, all our thoughts are with you and your mam :heart:
     
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  13. Johnjo

    Johnjo Senior Member

    May 29, 2017
    545
    243
    Birmingham
    So sorry for your loss BonnieCat.

    Lovely words and sentiments from Joe and Ducky. Totally agree with them.

    I'm sure a lot of us weren't with loved ones at the end as we would have liked to be. But I'm sure you have a lifetime of loving memories to help you at this awful time.

    Love and hugs johnjo.
     
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  14. thebiglad

    thebiglad Old fart, still riding !

    Sep 25, 2013
    5,064
    1,000
    Central France
    Hi Nikki, please believe me when I say that I was so very sorry to hear this very sad news.

    As we go through life there are very tough things to deal with; very sad things that we have no control over but hit us profoundly hard.

    Your Dad will know how much you loved and cared for him, rest assured he sees you now and sheds a tear for your pain.

    We never lose the ones we love, we just don't see them as much as we used to. But we will see them again, be sure about that.

    As the weather improves and you start to ride out again, share that joy for life with your Dad.

    Love and hugs from Dave & Wend
     
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  15. Tigcraft

    Tigcraft Unheard of Member

    Mar 29, 2014
    2,565
    800
    Holmfirth West Yorkshire
    Hi Nikki, what a sad ending. I’m sorry to hear. Eric
     
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  16. stollydriver

    stollydriver Elite Member

    Apr 25, 2015
    2,034
    800
    north wales
    Really sorry to hear your news - the more I look around the more I see and realise that we just do not know what is around the corner. One minute you can feel elated at life - then something knocks you on your arse. Sending you all my best wishes - stay strong.......
     
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  17. MadMrB

    MadMrB Elite Member

    Dec 24, 2018
    3,562
    800
    Northamptonshire, UK
    So sorry for your loss, and I wish you and your family all the best. It's an unfortunate reminder that we are only here for a finite time, and we should focus on enjoying what we have while we can.
     
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  18. Ken walburn

    Ken walburn Noble Member

    Jun 28, 2017
    888
    300
    Essex
    Nikki, have just picked up this thread. I am so so sorry to hear your sad news. It’s going to be tough to pick yourself up after two such devastating losses. Stay strong & remember we are all here to support new in time of need.
    Any time, PM me if you wish :broken_heart::heart: Kenny
     
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  19. Hobnail

    Hobnail Senior Member

    Jan 4, 2020
    1,245
    243
    USA
    Take time to grieve. Kindle memories. Hug friends. And only when you're ready, look to the future.
    In sympathy,
    k..
     
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  20. crispey

    crispey crispey creme de la creme

    Nov 6, 2014
    7,194
    1,000
    Uk
    I’m so sorry to hear this Nikki, you’ve had such a rough time lately! You can’t beat yourself up about going away, even your mum said it would be ok. My heart goes out to you and yours.
     
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