Since my two brothers and I all use the same cologne, we decided to buy it in bulk to save money. It's just common scents.
I made a paper airplane, but when I threw it, it didn't fly. It just stayed in one place and hovered. Then I realized why. It's stationary.
In a nursing home an elderly woman with dementia bursts into a man's room wearing only a cape, and yelling, "Super pussy!" The man replies, "I'll have the soup."
That's funny! It kinda' happened a few years ago when our family and my wife's brother's family were out in Pennsylvania Dutch country. We went to restaurant and when my 15 y/o nephew was ordering his meal it came with a choice of soup or salad. Waitress: Soup or salad? Nephew: Yes, please. Waitress: Soup or salad? Nephew: Yes, please. This went on for three rounds when my sister-in-law finally says: MICHAEL, you idiot! It's not super salad, it's SOUP OR SALAD! Nephew: Oh.
My wife and I had breakfast at a local restaurant this morning. I had eggs Benedict. There were two and a load of home fries. I could only finish one. When we were ready to go the waiter came to the table. Waiter: "Box for your leftovers?" Me: "No, can we flip a coin instead?"