I called the RSPCA today and said, "I've just found a suitcase in the woods containing a fox and four cubs." "That's terrible," she replied. "Are they moving?" "I'm not sure, to be honest," I said, "But that would explain the suitcase."
A few Stuart Francis gems:- I gave up my job in a helium gas factory - I refused to be spoken to in that tone I got a job as the night watchman in a dildo factory - that gave me the willy's Didn't sell a single copy of my autobiography - story of my life My best friend was diagnosed as a mute - he kept that quiet Is my French wife into golden showers - we we When I was a kid my fairy godmother asked me would I like a long penis, or a long memory - I forget my response If I had a pound for every time I complemented my wife - I would probably start complementing my wife My wife and I finally have something in common - we both agree she should have married George Cloney