Worst part of it is, if I go on Ebay now, the pictures down the side are of that piece of mutton with her fake boobs in various states of undress !!!!
i think this might have been on here before A man sees a sign outside a house - 'Talking Dog For Sale.' He rings the bell, the owner appears and tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden. The man sees a very nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there. "Do you really talk?" he asks the dog. "Yes," the Labrador replies. After recovering from the shock of hearing the dog talk, he man asks, "So, tell me your story." The Labrador looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the SAS. "In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one imagined that a dog would be eavesdropping. "I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at Heathrow to do some undercover security work, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded several medals. I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired." The man is amazed. He goes back into the house and asks the owner how much he wants for the dog. "Ten quid," the owner says. "£10!!? But this dog is absolutely amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?" "Because he's a lying bastard. He's never been out of the garden!!.
Repeats of the first series going out on DAVE or some such channel, got them on series link to record. That's Roy Kinnears son playing the middle aged guy !!!
Since splitting up with my girlfriend, I’ve been feeling pretty lonely at times. Last night it came to a head, lying naked and horny in bed I did something I haven’t needed to do for quite a long time. I rolled over and cuddled the wife!!..
Just saw the SUNDERLAND team playing football with a hedgehog. I was going to ring the RSPCA but the hedgehog was winning 4-0.
So I went in to a pet shop. I said, "Can I buy a goldfish?" The guy said, "Do you want an aquarium?" I said, "I don't care what star sign it is."
I actually feel sorry for Sunderland supporters and Moysie. Mad keen support but no financial support from your owners. You never stood a chance. I was up there for the Arsenal and Tottenham games this season and will probably see a couple next season.
You're gonna see more than me......I'm not going back Gave up my season ticket after 40yrs of hopeless optimism
That is so sad. Poor support from owners is nothing new in football, don't get me started; being a toon support for over 45 years I know excatly how you feel. Wessa
